My name is Clarissa. I am 19 years old and serving in the Canada Toronto mission. This is my story of my decision to serve a mission.
I have always wanted to serve a mission and would tell everyone that I was. But as I attend my first semester of college at BYU-Idaho I went with the flow and started to doubt my decision to serve a mission. This thought played in my mind all the time and I got scared. I started telling people that I wasn't going on a mission, but as those words flowed out of my mouth it felt wrong. I was confused and didn't understand what to do anymore.
During this time stake conference rolled around. I was so excited to attend. I wasn't sure why, because I never get excited for a two hour meeting. But this time I knew I was going to learn something. I went with an open heart and ready to listen. As I listened, I felt like every talk was about missionary work. I was constantly get the chills, and recognized these feelings as the Holy Ghost. Afterwards I called my mom. We talked about what I learned and what I had felt during conference. After talking for more than an hour I decided that a full time mission really was the right choice for me. I prayed to my Heavenly Father and told him I had made the decision to go on a mission and asked if that was the right decision for me. I waited and waited for an answer. I went to the temple a couple of times that week and was continually praying. I was looking for a huge awing moment in which I would get my answer, but it never came. I started to get disappointed and discouraged. I thought maybe the Lord didn't want me to go. After speaking with my mom, she reminded me that I did have moments where I knew I was supposed to go on a mission. I felt a confirmation while at stake conference and every time I spoke about going on a mission. I realized that throughout my whole life I knew I was going to serve a mission and that I didn't need a huge and spectacular answer to let me know.